With A Little Help From My Friends

I consider myself to be a pretty decent friend. If someone needs something, I like to think they can count on me. For example, the other night I was playing catch with a friend. He mentioned he wanted to get a glove for himself so we could do this more often; maybe even have a scrimmage with enough people. Sure! Great idea! So the next day he Facebooked me, telling me he picked up a glove and I should meet at the diamonds to throw the ball around. I had just worked all day, had gone to the gym, hadn’t eaten dinner yet (which, for a foodie, is a meal I hate skimping on)…but I knew he was just SO excited to play, so who was I to let him down? I sucked it up, wolfed down some leftovers, and headed out with another friend in tow. We get to the diamond and he’s not there. I call him & his girlfriend and he’s ditching because he ate too much and he’s full! Are you serious?? I was kinda ticked but made the most of it.

Today I had plans to take part in my community’s endeavors to clean up our city. I also had a lunch date with a co-worker immediately after, so I thought, “why not combine the two?” He agreed. Now, this lunch date was supposed to be a thank you for helping him out with something. We agreed to meet at work at 10 am, but at 9:30 he called to cancel. Canceling last minute with the reason he only just gone to bed didn’t fly with me. He knew it was just he and I taking part in the clean up, but had complete disregard for me, and cancels. At this time I’d like to interject that I’ve been canceled on last minute before by others and it puts me in a rage. Makes me feel disrespected and unimportant. What makes you think my time isn’t valuable and can be wasted? So I let him have it. At the end of my rant, I still had not received an apology. He actually asked, “so where are we going for lunch?” Umm pretty sure we WON’T be having lunch together. Besides weren’t you already trying to make it up to me for something else?

I wonder if I bring this upon myself. Am I that much of a pushover? I didn’t think so… So the next time you cancel on someone last minute or invite someone somewhere and noshow with a bullshit excuse, think about how it makes you look, and more importantly, how you just made the other person feel.

2 thoughts on “With A Little Help From My Friends

  1. I get this a lot, unfortunately, and have often wondered if I need to change what I’m doing. You know what though, it’s who I am, and I like that!! My friends and co workers know that if they are in a pinch I’ll do my best to help. I may get hurt and frustrated along the way but in the end I’m glad to be known as reliable and compassionate. Take comfort in knowing your awesome:)

  2. Was browsing on MFP and ran across your profile and link to your blog…I have the same problem with people! I finally cut out the “friends” who would take me for granted. While I’m still willing to help out when needed and be there for people, it’s only for the ones who appreciate it. It makes me feel better to know that I have some genuine friendships and not just people who are using me to satisfy their needs.

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